no i'm not talking about me.....this chick that i work with sleeps with anything that moves...she is the meaning of the word company hoe.... she has slept with half the guys in here...and the other half are just not that needy....anyway this guy that works here tried to hit it...for some reason she now has morals and would not give in..okay i understand no is no.... ya tell him no and avoid him... ya dont make it a point to talk to this person everyday..100 times a day right..... laugh when he flirts....flip your hair around when he is around...this is a tease...well he went to rub her shoulders cause she claim to have a backace... and she freaked out...filed a claim and out the door he went.... dont get me wrong i'm so not a fan of his... i dont even look at him ...Yuck......she is alright but needy desprate the whole nine...my feeling is this if your gonna act like a bag...expect to be treated like one.....dont demand respect were its for sure not warrented.....i dont know maybe i'm wrong...there both sleeze bags......i dont know what to make of it....my .02 if you cant take the heat you should never be in the kitchen in the first place...if you did nothing to drive this man to touch you...yes then he deserve to get tossed like a rag...but if your playing with it deal with it...its not sexual harassemt if your going along with it is it???????

Sounds like they are both at fault. Her more than him, but he needed to exercise moral judgement and not think it was ok to put his hands on her in the office setting. I can understand him feeling like he got the bad end of that deal though. She was giving him signals that it was ok to be in her personal space like that but he still needed to take the high road and not give into that temptation even if she invited it.

She suckered him and now he's out on his patooty.:Sarcastic:

I'm kind of bewildered by the sexual harrassment laws myself. I use to work in a factory with a thousand guys back in the 70's and believe me I was sexually harrassed. The stuff that guys get fired over nowadays seem so mild. Heck, even I can get pretty bawdy and tell some off color jokes at work. I could get in big trouble for that by the sexual harrassment standards. But the men never say a word about it. If one of them would tell me to stop I would definately respect their wishes and quit. So I don't see that as harrassment. To me it would be harrassment if I kept on doing it after I was asked to quit.

I might get into some trouble by saying this, but I think that some females just like to cause trouble. We had one where I work who was always using her sexuality to keep the workplace in turmoil. She was performing sex acts in the parking lot. She broke up marriages and one man killed himself. She accused my ex-supervisor of sexual harrassment and I'm pretty sure he didn't do any such thing. If he did, all you'd have to do is say no and that would be the end of that. Now if a man doesn't take NO for an answer or he tries to use sex as a lever to job advancement or job performance ....... then I think that's totally wrong.

But some of the stuff that these guys get in trouble for in the name of sexual harrassment just amazes me. I bet that chick at your work was on one heck of a power trip after that. :Sarcastic:

__________________
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I always feel like women who behave this badly have emotional damage. Im not excusing them because they're responsible for their behavoir but on many levels my heart goes out to them. Of course, its frustrating as hell when the mess up the balance of friendliness and closeness of coworkers by putting an inappropriate sexual spin on it.

Ive read sexual aggressiveness is a symptom of bipolar syndrome and it matched a coworkers behavior so I believe it.

Its one thing to be a friendly flirt in the workplace and another to be a sexual flirt. When you got mixed message being sent, it messes up the reality of genuine sexual harassment situations.

Sun,

I respectfully agree with all you just said EXCEPT the way you made the comment about bipolar syndrome. Sexual aggresiveness can be related to many, many, many different conditions of people. I'd like to advocate for those with the disorder of bipolar & say that is not a primary feature of bipolar.

Nothing personal at all, but sometimes I just feel the need to advocate for those who don't often advocate for themselves.

Wow Luv, what an awful woman!

I'm also a believer in the 'you should be able to say no'. I had a GUY at work, file a sexual harrassment complaint on my behalf yes that can be done! He was after my male bosses job. so we were in a meeting one day, i worked with all men(still do) since i'm in a technical posistion, and the boss turns before the meeting starts and says 'wow your hair looks really nice today did you change it?' i blushed of course since i was centred out but just said no, was flattered, and the meeting went on. Well my coworker, took that to HR on my behalf saying it was an inappropriate comment, and sexual harrassment. I tried to have it dropped (i even went to our vice president) but was unable as sexual harrassment is not just something that makes you uncomfortable, but something that makes others uncomfortable around you. HUH???? Anyway, the boss was first demoted, then eventually let go. I apologised to him once at a xmas party, and he said he knew it wasn't me and who had done it. I felt so bad about the situation. Gladly the coworker never got the bosses job. which i was glad about.

Funny thing is this boss was a huge mail chauvanist (sp?), and had said alot of other things to me about how he thought it was 'cute' that i was trying to work in a male dominant dept, and how he kept his wife at home barefoot and pregnant where she belonged...and he got fired for complimenting my hair??? I always just thought he was a goof and i laughed at him. I don't offend that easily.

I believe it should have been up to me to decide if that comment was inappropriate or not since it was aimed at me. After that, the guys wouldn't tell jokes in front of me, and my new boss, who was male barely spoke to me, i'm sure he was terrified to even look at me!

LUVS I THINK WE ARE ON THE SAME PAGE WHEN IT COMES TO THIS.... I KNOW I HAD A GUY HERE TWO YEARS AGO BUGGING THE SHIT OUT OF ME... BUT BEFORE I KNEW WHAT HE WAS REALLY LIKE... I HOOKED HIM UP WITH ONE OF MY FRIENDS..... AND THE WHOLE NIGHT HE JUST STARED AT ME....CANT BLAME THE GUY...(I'M CUTE AS HELL)... KIDDING...ANYWAY KNOWING DAM RIGHT WELL I WAS WITH ASS MAN AND NO ONE COULD TURN MY HEAD AWAY FROM HIM....HE DIDNT CARE....HE WAS ON ME LIKE WHITE ON RICE.....HE DIDNT LIKE MY FRIEND AND MY FRIEND STILL ISNT TALKING TO ME....(KIDDING)... IT WAS A BAD MATCH... NOT TO GET OFF THE POINT AT HAND...AFTER THAT ONE DATE HE GOT REALLY WIERD....LIKE HE WOULD NOTICE EVERY LITTLE THING ABOUT ME...RIGHT DOWN TO THE COLOR OF SCRINCHIES I WORE IN MY HAIR....EVERYDAY HE WOULD SAY OH- ARE THOES NEW SNEAKERS....OH - YOUR WEARING YOUR HAIR DOWN...OH--I NEVER SEEN YOU WITH THAT COLOR PONYTAIL BEFORE... OH NEW SHIRT....NO ITS NOT A NEW EFFING SHIRT...WELL I DONT REMEMBER YOU WEARING IT HERE BEFORE.....LIKE THIS MOTHER EFFER WAS GONNA WIN A PRIZE FOR NOTICING SOMETHING DIFFERENT ON ME EVERYDAY....DROVE ME SHIT HOUSE... BUT BECAUSE I WELCOMED HIM IN TO MY WORLD CAUSE I THOUGHT HE WAS NORMAL I HAD TO DEAL.....HE STARTED WRITING ME VERY WEIRD NOTES...LIKE IF I WAS OUT SICK OR JUST DIDNT COME IN... I WOULD GET A NOTE...ROSES ARE RED BLAH BLAH BLAH....OKAY SO HE WAS A FREAK....FINALLY AFTER MONTHS OF JUST WALKING BY HIM AND NOT EVEN TALKING TO HIM HE GOT THE MESSAGE...BUT I PUT HIM ON TOTAL IGNORE FOR A LONG TIME BEFORE HE GOT IT... HE WOULD COME IN MY OFFICE AND I WOULD JUST WALK RIGHT OUT.... I TOLD HIM SEVERAL TIMES THAT HE WAS NOT GONNA WIN A PRIZE FOR NOTICING SOMETHING DIFFERENT ON ME...BACK OFF...WELL THEN MY GUY FRIENDS HERE AT WORK STARTED HARRASSING ME ON A JOKING LEVEL....HEY YOUR CHEWING DIFFENT GUM TODAY I NEVER SEEN YOU CHEWING THAT GUM BEFORE....OH YA FUN TIMES HAD BY ALL......BUT DO YOU SEE MY POINT.... I PUT MYSELF IN THAT SPOT..I HANDLE IT MYSELF.......OH I DONT KNOW WHAT POINT I'M TRYING TO MAKE TODAY... I DONT EVEN KNOW IF ANYTHIS MAKES SENSE.....I GUESS DONT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT......

I worked in a company where our boss was really good looking. The women used to joke privately that he looked like a department store underwear model, LOL!!

But his secretary got caught doing something wrong in the office and got fired for it. She deserved to get fired for what she did. She was pissed off about getting fired and slapped the boss with a sexual harrassment suit as revenge. She even dragged me into it as a witness and I KNEW there was no basis to her complaint, yet she figured another woman would back her. THere was absolutely nothing to her claim that I ever could have witnessed!!!

I got dragged into all kinds of meetings with HR and legal about my boss and let me tell you this about him. I worked in sales and me and other female sales reps used to travel with this man all over the country. We'd sit in close quarters on airplanes, drive long distances in cars, etc. We'd go out to dinner and events on business trips and even drink wine and beer at these dinners or at social events, which is customary behavior in our industry. He never ONCE did anything out of line on those trips or in the office. He was very dedicated to his wife and very proper with his staff.

I was very emphatic with HR and legal about his exemplary behavior and they finally dismissed her suit as frivolous, but my poor boss had really taken a beating over this. He did nothing wrong, but she really managed to cause a lot of trouble and that was her intent -- to not go quietly into the night. Sheesh!!

Nancy, Ive checked the site and I got it wrong.

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/bipolar.cfm
The National Institute of Mental Health (NIHM) website's page on Bipolar Disorder included "Increased sexual drive", NOT aggressiveness, in a list of 14 possible signs/ symptoms of the manic episode.

Granted my experience was only what I'd read there and with one person - I dont want to be part of using generalizations for ANY group of people.

Thanks, Sun!

And by the same token, there are all different reasons why different people might have increased sexual drive, sexual aggresiveness, etc. And all different reasons why people attempt to be manipulative. And sex is often a tool used for manipulation.

OK. I'll get off my soap box now.