I'm baaaack!

Don't know if anyone has noticed, but I've been AWOL for awhile. :OMG: And man have I gained the blubber!

I jumped back on board a few weeks a go and decided to start July off with a return to the beach and to journaling. I haven't been sticking to a strict SBD plan. I find it easier to get started dieting by doing an Atkins-like induction first. Maybe I'm not suppose to say that because this is a SBD board but I think it's more important to do what's best for the individual person. And eating a low carb/high fat plan helps me get started and withdraw from my evil sugar demon.
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I have practically survived on nothing but sugary snacks, sodas, and carbage. I can not tell you how bad I've felt. It's a vicious circle, I'm telling you. I've felt horrible, but I couldn't control myself. I couldn't stop eating the sugar. I swear I must have gotten malnourished. Oh, you can be heavy and be malnourished. There are practically NO vitamins in sugar. I just know that I was so tired and had no energy at all.

Dr. Agatson was so right when he wrote that sugar gives you a quick high but it doesn't last long at all and then you're crashing and needing more sugar. I am proud to report that I haven't had any sugar for at least 2 weeks now. None.

AND I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER!!!

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Man, my desk top seems to have caught some kind of virus or something. So I'm writing this on an old slow dilapidated laptop that was given to me. I'm lucky to even be able to get here.

I haven't quite gotten on board with South Beach yet as I'm still not eating many carbs and haven't lowered my fat intake. I also haven't switched over to healthier fats. I've still got some butter left and cream and such. I never throw food away. I've been too poor to do something like that. I almost look at it as a sin to throw out food. So, maybe by next week I'll be ready. I don't want to up my carbs without lowering my fat levels.

I'm going to participate in a study for a new cholesterol treatment plan. I've been on Zocor for a year now and my cholesterol is still high. My good cholesterol is good but my bad is too high and so are my triglycerides. I'm going to go off my Zocor and participate in this trail and they pay me for my time. And who knows, it might be something that works.

Part of it is diet and I asked the doctor what kind and she described it to me. I told her it sounded just like South Beach where as she proceeded to tell me that SBD was bad because the body can't process all that protein and meat and it's bad for the liver and yada, yada, yada. I didn't argue with her then but she obviously has SB mixed up with Atkins. I hope that as time goes by I can educate this doctor so that she'll know the difference between Atkins and SB.

Another reason I haven't full fledged started yet is that I want to get more time under my belt (pardon the pun) of not having sugar. I have a long bad sordid history with refined white sugar and high fructose corn syrup and all things of that nature. I haven't totally given up all things that taste sweet. I still have the occasional sugar free piece of candy or 1/2 cup of no sugar added ice cream. I can handle myself with that stuff. If it were real sugar though I'd be eating 1/2 a quart of ice cream or 2 to 3 full size candy bars. I just crave more and more of it. So, it's best for me to stay far, far away from real sugar.
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I went to physical therapy this morning. I have so many problems with my back that it's just not funny. I'm trying to avoid surgery but I think I'm eventually going to need it. Especially if I stay at the kind of work I do.

I'm going to get off of here for now and fill out an application for financial aid to attend school next year. I think I might like being a paralegal or medical coding and billing. At least something with more sitting down and not so much physical labor.

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I'm just doing a quick drive by today. I'm still doing well with my eating. No sugar. I do feel that I'm going to start cutting down on portion sizes at this point.

I can't find my scales, but I know I'm losing weight because my clothes are fitting better and better and I FEEL like I've lost weight. That's better than any old number on the scale anyway.

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Hey Luv!! Nice to see you back on here. Glad you are feeling so much better.
I started SB again, but am currently (off) the wagon..... I have started just keeping my calories down and not eating much. I know thats bad, but I'm hoping to shrink my stomach a little and then jump back on SB. I do have a sweet treat every now and then, but thats only around that time of month.
Glad to see you here!!

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HELLO!

I'm glad to see you stop by. I was starting to wonder if anybody liked me.

This will be another quickie. I'm still doing well with my fight against the sugar/carb demons. For some reason it's been easier than I thought it would be this time. I guess because I want this pain in my back to stop and I know that my weight is a factor.

In my last post, I wrote that I was going to work on reducing my portion sizes. I feel that I am doing that and eating less. I'm working on using up the fatty meats and stuff that I have around here. When I buy groceries next time I'll be buying lower fat items. I also need to take some cans goods to the local food pantry because I know I'm not going to eat some of this stuff I've got like canned potatoes.
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I'm not going to miss anything but the real cream for my coffee. I love cream for coffee. I'm thinking that if it comes right down to it I'm going to keep that and limit it to just one cup a day.

I think that I'm going to have to severely limit my soda consumption. I recently had a bone density scan done and haven't gotten the results yet, but my x-rays on my back show some bone thinning. I'm not sure if it's from getting older or if the diet soda is a contributing factor. I drink a lot of it.

Well, that's all for now. I still can't find my scales that I put away in the basement. I sure put them away really well. I go for a check up in August and they'll weigh me then. So, we shall see .......

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I am trying so hard. I am really trying to get the Atkins foods used up so I can start on SB fully. I just didn't realize how much I had stocked up on fatty cuts of meat and stuff. I even had chicken wings for breakfast yesterday to try to use them up. For lunch, I made the Biker Goddess pizza to use up the pepperoni and full fat cheeses. And for dinner I made low carb fried chicken with chicken thighs and legs and coconut oil. I also made cauliflower and asperagus with melted cheese to get rid of more of the regular cheese.

And I still have cheese and chicken legs and thighs left!!! Which reminds me ....... I need to throw some of them in the crockpot and have them for dinner. I am really, really hoping that I can be done with the modified Atkins I've been doing by Wednesday and ready to jump into South Beach. The South Beach woe is what I really want to do. And that's what my doctor wants me on, too. He would crap if he knew I was doing Atkins again!

I am losing weight though. What use to be tight is now kind of loose on me. I believe that cutting down on the portion sizes was a very wise thing to do. Just because a food is legal doesn't mean that a person can over-indulge in it. In the end ....... it all comes down to calories. I don't care what anyone says. I do know WHY Atkins and SB don't want people to be too hung up on calories ...... but they DO matter. And suggesting to someone like me to eat until they're satisfied is not going to work. My stomach may be full and satisfied but my mind wants that comfort food to continue.
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I think that everything goes hand in hand in life ...... mind, body, and soul.

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I messed up! I ate some sugary stuff at work which spilled over into my home life. I did manage to get a grip within a 24 hour period and then didn't hardly eat or drink anything for the next 24 hours.

I'm disgusted and depressed over my physical health problem. I had an epidural spinal injection and a shot in my hip on June 6th. and it was like heaven. I started on a new medication and physical therapy. I think that I could make and keep some progress going if I had a different job.

I work as a custodian and I can't hardly make it. I'm on a concrete floor all night, pushing this and pulling that and lifting and twisting. And now I feel like I'm right back where I started before the epidural. I missed work last night and when I got up today I was so stiff I could hardly move. This is hard for me because I've always been in very good health and I always thought I could do anything. I hate this! Last year I was walking 5 miles and bicycling 40 miles at a time. Now my legs feel so weak and when I've been working for a while I start limping. I can't do my job very well and I've always been proud of my work.
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Right now I support my sister and my son, 2 dogs and a cat. So, it's essential that I keep working. If it were just me, I half way think I would just quit, collect my retirement money and live off that while going to school until I could get a new job. BUT, there goes my insurance. So I'm screwed and I'm depressed and I'm worried about how much longer I can do this job.

I have no skills and no education and I don't know what career I can go into now at 50. I have a few college credits from years a go. I got in trouble and ended up on financial aid suspension. That was about 15 years a go but they haven't forgotten. I applied for a loan which goes through Financial Aid and I got a letter.

I wrote the committee back and told them that it was at least 13 years a go and I don't remember what happened and even if I did I wouldn't be able to provide documentation after all this time. So, I'm waiting for an answer from them. But, I really just wanted a funky old loan from them that I will pay back. My credit is excellent. But, I guess in order to apply for a loan you have to go through all that other stuff.

I have alternative plans if they turn me down. After I get two more classes under my belt I'm back in good standing. Since I work for a college I can take 2 classes for free. Silly, I know, but I would rather pay and go to my local community college which is closer. Not to mention, the place I work for wants me to take the ACT test to take classes there.

Oh well, back to my eating. I am set to go full fledged SBD on Sunday. I finally used up all but one stick of butter, a package of hot dogs, a little wedge of regular cheese, and some paltry amount of pork rinds. All of the darn chicken wings, legs and thighs are gone. The other fatty meat and cheese things are also history. I am ready to start phase one again. Not that I have to. I could start at phase 2 since I've been doing a modified Atkins type plan, but I feel I need the experience since it's been a long time since I've done phase 1.

I'm going to TRY and take a bike ride on Sunday. I haven't been on it for probably a year now. But, I feel like my legs are getting so weak from my back problems. I find myself stumbling and limping sometimes. So, I'm going to try to go for just 10 miles and see how I tolerate that.

Wish me luck! :Hug2:

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Wow, not much going on around here. It's almost like I've got my own forum to just run wildly in. I can run around with scissors and no one is here to stop me.

Today is the day that I've set for myself to go from my modified Atkins plan into phase one of South Beach. It's still early but I don't feel like eating breakfast. So, I'm just having my coffee with fat free half and half, vitamins and some Metamucil. Oh, I'm definitely going to keep taking my fiber. Then I'll probably just have a mid-morning snack later. Maybe some dry roasted almonds.

It feels great to not have my clothes fit so tightly. I think my losing has slowed somewhat though. Exercising would help but I just don't think I can do it right now. Maybe after I get my second epidural in August. But I think the trouble with epidurals is that they don't last very long, unfortunately. But, who knows? I might start feeling better on my own. Life is so unpredictable.

Well, I've got things to do. Get a Sunday paper, get a few groceries, write out checks for bills , and I need to put some stuff on eBay. That's a lot of work. Taking the pics, putting on the computer and fixing them in my program, and then listing them. You need to describe the items, take measurements, and all that.

But, I need the money and I've got so much stuff here. My mom's stuff, my son moved in and he's got his mil's stuff, and his stuff, and there's just too much stuff here! And when my sister finally gets in a group home they'll be even more stuff! I really should have a yard sale and I will later in the summer when it cools down. I'm figuring out how I'm going to do it. I don't think I want to price everything individually so I'm thinking of coming up with a color coded sort of pricing system. I think I have enough tables, but I'm going to make a way to hang clothes. Like a clothes rack. I've got some ideas of how to do it. I just don't know which plan to go with ...... most likely the one that's going to cost less.

Yeah, money is tight. I'm waiting for my sister's SSI to get approved and then I can stop supporting her. And if my son don't find a job or get some money coming in soon I'm going to flip out! First his job kept dicking with him. (OK, sometimes my language gets colorful) Then they denied his unemployment benefits. Now when we thought it was finally over, they've sent him a paper where he can defend his dismissal. So, more waiting for that. He did go job hunting yesterday. He starts school in August and I really wanted him to be able to pay for his class and book. I'm already feeding him, buying his cigarettes, paying for his storage locker and I've spent $350.00 on vet bills for his dog.
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Oh, I'm not really upset. I love my son and my sister. I am the most responsible person in this family. I just don't know what's going to happen to them if something happens to me and I feel a lot of pressure.

I guess my rant is over now. I'd better get busy! :Hug2:

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I wish I could say that things were off without a hitch but that wouldn't be entirely true. I can't tell that lie. I'm still stuck somewhere between a modified Atkins and SB. I found more Atkins food when I was going through my cabinets to see what I needed from the store. Like I still had butter, full fat mayo, a whole summer sausage, fatty salad dressing, Dreamfields pasta, etc.

I did go buy some low fat cheeses, ff sour cream, ff mayo, Smart Balance spread, and some other SBD foods. So, I'm working on making the transition this week and I'll be starting a phase one thread for next week. I am positive I'll be 100% ready by then. I'm hyped!!

I didn't try bike riding on Sunday. I can't take the chance of being too worn out for work tonight. I missed two days after I shampooed carpet at work. That just killed me. I had to bend over a lot and the next 2 days I hurt all over, even my hips hurt.

Man, I sure am doing an awful lot of complaining and I'm sorry. I do have a positive outlook most of the time.

I've been playing a game on a website where you can win points to redeem for gift cards. I've almost got enough for a $25.00 card. If you want to check it out please follow my referal link because I also make a little bit if I can get some people to join under my name. Just be sure to confirm your email address or I don't get squat. It seems slow at first but I just keep it opened in one little browser window while I surf the net or do whatever in another browser. You automatically get your first 1000 points free and I think I get 400 for getting people to sign up. So, here's the link and the game is super easy.
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http://jackpot.netwinner.com/?signupCode=piasabird

I also visit another site that pays you for posting in points that you can redeem for gift cards. If you make a certain amount of points in one month you have an option of getting cash, but I could never get 3000 points in a month. I just now got enough for my first card. I think that I might try selling the gift cards on eBay.

I answer surveys and do trial offers on another site that pays cash. So far I've gotten a check for $11.60. I wanted to make sure the place was legit before I wasted too much time on them. Now I'm up to over $30.00 for this month and I'm not done yet. I'm not going to get rich but every little bit helps. If you ever think you're interested in doing something like that I wouldn't give them my main email address because I get spammed so bad now. I figured that would happen though and I have 3 email accounts.

Well, I have to nap before work. Bye!

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I went ahead and threw out the butter and sausage stick and I'm going to look through everything again and throw out what doesn't fit with my new way of eating. That's a big thing for me. Always having been fairly poor I've learned to never throw away good food.

My son finally got a job today! He starts Friday night. That is so great. It onlu pays half of what his last job pays but the hours are perfect for him to begin school in August. He worked there before and liked it and they like him so that's always a plus. I'm not that worried about getting a share of the rent or utilities from him. I just want him to be able to buy his own cigarettes, personal care items, pay his storage locker fees, pay for his class and books.

There's a load off my mind. Now we just need to worry about transportation. His car was repossesed and he said he'd ride a bike, but he gets off at 2 in the morning and I'm worried. He's grown though so I have to let him be. I'm just going to make sure he's got a headlight and back lights and reflective gear on.
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My last therapy session is in the morning. In a way I'm glad. I'm tired of going and I don't see that it does any good. I have never had good results with physical therapy unless it was rehab post surgery.

My eating has been far from perfect today. That's all I'm going to say about that. I haven't slept well either and I have to go to work soon. Well, I'm going to go make some coffee. I'll probably be needing it.

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